Recently, I started feeling stressed and caught up in “to dos”.  I noticed I started to have that feeling that if I didn’t get it ALL DONE that somehow I wouldn’t be ok.  My kids or someone in my family might not be ok if I didn’t take care of all the holiday stuff I thought I had to take care of.

This was a lie.

I never HAD to take care of everything on my list.  I just thought I did.

And once I caught myself in this ill suited story (AKA, a lie), I would close my eyes, take a few deep breaths and start to feel the tension in my body.  I’d let some of the pain + stress move through me. (As much as I could anyway.)

This brought me some relief.

Just enough relief actually, that I could tell myself the Truth: Do what you can.  Let the other stuff go if you need to.

Once in the space of relief, I relaxed more. And, felt better as I did partake in my “to dos.”

Everything flowed much better from this place of relief.

Gifts I thought I had to search for, surfaced without any searching.

I bought many things on sale and with free or minimal shipping.

Why does this matter?

Well, it’s not a big deal actually.  However it supports the point that, when we take time to align ourselves, to shift from stress and hurrying, to slowing down and feeling better, we open ourselves up to an energy that helps us.

And, when we try hard, push, and stress, we create resistance.

We shut ourselves down to following the easy path and instead take the harder path.

Both options are viable.

One just feels a heck of a lot better!

So, I share this because helping your kids and yourself Shine this year.  AKA- Thrive.  Feel awesome.  Do awesome things.  Get along well. Move past crappy situations… All of this happens much more easily when we open up to the energy that helps us.

I refer to this as higher vibration energy.

Vs. lower vibration energy.

Stick with me for a moment..

See, emotions are comprised of energy. Everything is comprised of energy.  Your computer, your phone, the chair or car you may be sitting in. The house you live in. Your clothing.  Everything.

When is comes to emotions, each emotion vibrates at a different level.  Some emotions vibrate at a lower level, some in the middle, and some at a much higher level.

Here’s a super quick example of how emotions vibrate:

Joy– super high vibration

Content– medium vibration

Depression– low vibration

Despair– Super low vibration

The reason I’m sharing this is so that (if you’re willing) you can pay attention to where your thoughts and emotions are.

If you’re in sadness or depression.  Ok. be there. However, if you stay here for awhile and decide to take action to help your kids or get sh*t done, don’t be surprised if it takes 10 extra steps to make a difference or accomplish what you hoped to accomplish.

This is because you can only attract circumstances and situations that match where you are emotionally vibrating at.

If you’re trying to help your kids heal in some way, and you’re feeling cruddy yourself, I guarantee it’ll take at least 10x  longer and it’ll feel like an uphill “battle” to really make progress.

Remember, this is due to your thoughts and emotions being in a lower vibration.

And, this is one of the main reasons why parents who want to help their kids clear from ADD, ADHD, autism, anxiety, or anything for that matter, don’t always make the progress they’d like.

Because the parents themselves are stuck in a lower feeling and thinking vibration. (Been there and done that by the way!)

Healing anyone or anything requires higher vibrations.

So, on the flip side, if you make it a point to realign yourself with higher vibrations EVERYDAY you will make your journey to heal your kids or yourself MUCH easier.

Or, if you’re just looking to feel freakin’ awesome and create fun awesome experiences in your life and your kids, focusing your thinking and actions so that you make being in higher vibration emotions DAILY, will help you to make this shift.

Here’s the thing though.

It takes courage and focus.

Courage because most people have been taught to follow the path of struggle and martyrdom. And, when you follow a higher vibration path (i.e. doing things that are fun and uplifting) people wonder what you’re up to.  Why you aren’t struggling and working extra hard. You start to not fit in with the “lets struggle, complain, and feel bad for ourselves” group.

In time, you won’t mind though, because feeling awesome will trump feeling crappy.

Next, it takes serious focus.

Instead of focusing on what you can do to help your kids (next 10 steps to take) or to help  yourself (additional 10 steps to take), you will need to make finding ways to feel good and raise your emotions into the space of higher vibrations the main priority.

This takes Focus and daily application.

And, will pay off in MAJOR returns if done consistently.

This my friend, is one of the missing pieces in the feel-good-thrive + help your-kids-heal recipe.

Many others have great ideas for food or supplements. (Time to pat myself on the back- I’m one of them! wink, wink!)

Most of these ideas are helpful.  However, food and supplements create a portion of the healing. They don’t create complete healing.

Directing your thoughts and emotions helps to complete the healing.

If you’re taking action from lower vibration thinking and emotions, it may feel like you’re on a hamster wheel.  Or making some progress, but, just not enough.

Get off the hamster wheel.

Make the difference in your life and your kid’s life too.

Pay attention to your emotions and thinking.

And yes, this is the part where I tell you I can help.

I do this daily.

And I help clients do this too.

In the meanwhile, no need to reach out to me if you’re not ready.

Just start noticing your thinking on your own, and catch yourself when you feel “low”.  Stay there for a bit, but, move the heck on if you want MORE for you and your family!!!

Blessings!  You so deserve living an awesome, more easeful life with your family.

Now’s the time.

Go for it!

Sending you love now and for the year ahead!

Rock on Mamas!

Here’s to HIGH Vibrations in 2019!!!

xo,

Andrea!

PS  Something for you:  Freebie audio shares  3 steps to help you make MORE progress with moving past your kid’s ADD, ADHD, autism or anxiety symptoms. Here’s that link: http://www.ihealedmysons.com/free-gift/

 

Andrea Anderson, CHHC

Author. Health Coach + Mentor

For Families with anxiety, sensory concerns, learning challenges,

ADD, ADHD + autism.

Helping moms improve their kids + teen’s symptoms naturally

and get their life back!

IHealedMySons.com

 

 

 

My family and I recently travelled to Niagra Falls, Canada.

This photo is one I took while on our trip.

And, while this pic. looks pretty cool in and of itself.  It actually has a whole story behind it.

See, had I not decided to follow through on an urge I had to travel back to Niagra Falls, I wouldn’t have gotten this cool photo nor would I have seen the Falls on a sunny day.

BTW, we visited the Falls when we first arrived in Canada, however it was raining and cloudy and we didn’t have much of a view on that particular day.

However, on our last day in Canada, when we had planned on going to just one more tourist attraction (the CN Tower) and driving back home – (10 hours), we awoke to a bright sunny day.

And, my husband and I agreed, we wanted to see Niagra Falls again. And, we’d therefore fit it into our schedule.

Guess what?

Neither of my sons were too psyched with this idea.

As a matter of fact, they were ticked off with this idea.

They wanted to go HOME, it was 10 hours of driving and we were already fitting in one activity before we’d be leaving Canada. (Let alone two!)

They were concerned with getting home so late.

Often I try to honor what everyone wants. After all, we’re all individuals with individual needs and interests.

And, at the same time, we’re a family unit.

And, sometimes people in the family might not get exactly what they want this time.

But in the process, can learn flexibility and how to go with the flow.

So, needless to say, we travelled back to Niagra Falls and had what turned out to be a magnificent view of the Falls.

For me it was mesmerizing.

Even with my son complaining in my right ear about how he wanted to go, I managed to tune him out.  I had addressed him one too many times for my comfort level and knew addressing him again wouldn’t change his view or mine, so I just let it go.  I ignored him.  Not out of abandonment, but, out of and internal desire to feel good.

To enjoy this moment.

To really take it in and feel some goodness from it.

Instead of allowing myself to be a victim to circumstances beyond my control in those moments.

And, I mostly met with success.

For a few minutes I felt good.

I dropped my story of “How can my sons be acting this way after such a cool trip…and blah, blah…” getting into my own personal woes me story of how they weren’t appreciating or accommodating us as parents….

I say blah, blah, blah because this is a parental way of being a victim.

Telling the “woes me story”, my kid is doing this or that, you fill in the blank with whatever action or non-action your kid is doing that has you feeling bad about yourself or your place in life.

This story is a sure way to keep you stuck.

To keep you repeating the same cycle of them doing shit you don’t like and you reacting to it with heaviness, sadness, anger or sometimes even depression.

Been through all of it myself.

And, every now and then dip my toe into “Woes me again”, and now tend to more quickly catch myself and realize this is a BS story.

One that leads to feeling crappy.

And, one that holds me back.

And helps my family to stay stuck.

So I find it much more freeing to let that crappy story go.

So, in those few moments as I stood before the Falls on a bright sunny day, I ignored my son. (One son btw, had let go of complaining by the time we reached the Falls, he saw it was futile and decided to relax.) However the other son was holding on strong and held fast to wanting to get the heck out of there.

So, as I was saying, I stood in front of the Falls, leaned against the fence and watched the water. I really took in the landscape before me. And of course, I just had to take several photos.

I started to get a little excited with the rainbows that emerged.

I took more photos and watched the water again.

No, my son didn’t give up.

Not fully anyway.

He grew slightly quieter, a little less complaining, but would whisper every now and then, “Lets go.”

We didn’t leave until I felt full. Content. More at peace.

Then, we left.

I felt better as we left. After all, we just saw one of the 7 wonders of the world, and it was a spectacular day with rainbows and all.

Then, we made our way back to the car.

And, annoyance crept out of my son.

And, I allowed myself to take it personally.

Ugh.

That means I went back into “Woes me story”.  You know the, “How could he do this story…”

Sh*t, I hate when I do that.

Go from a great moment, even bypass crap going on around me and then, boom, right back into crap again.

What’s up with that?

However, as we got in the car and drove back into the US, everyone in the car settled down.

I had time to process and let go.

And, I had a mini revelation.

Nothing I hadn’t thought of before.

Just something I hadn’t been thinking of and feeling in a while.

I realized, (get ready for this one)… I realized “So what??!!”

Yup.

So what?!

What do I mean by this?

I mean, so what my kids were acting in a way I wasn’t proud of or felt good about.

So what we had different ideas about what to do and not to do on our last day in Canada.

So what I thought my kids were “pain in the butts.”

So what things didn’t go perfectly.

So what I didn’t have peace and quiet when I went to the Falls so I could REALLY appreciate it.

So what things didn’t go the way I ideally would have liked?!

So the “F” what?!!!

The more I remembered “So what”, the more my body +  brain felt relief.

I began to detach from my woes me story and aligned back into a place of feeling comfortable and more powerful again.

It’s always empowering to remember we’re NOT victims.

And that we always have a choice.

To take things personally, attach to a story that doesn’t feel good.

Or realize we don’t like the situation, and then do what we can to step out of it, as much as we are able to in the moment.

And to view the story as a passing situation.  One we didn’t like, but, one that is NOT that BIG of a deal.

That’s the clincher.

The less of a deal we make of something, the quicker it passes.

And the quicker we can align with better feelings and better circumstances.

We can’t ever have something that feels wonderful and great with ourselves and our kids if we constantly focus on what they do “wrong” or we feel bad for ourselves.

So, if you’re able, try softening your thoughts the next time you find yourself taking something personally and starting to go into “woes me” over something your kids have done.

Softening means finding ways to see and feel the situation with the stance of “So what?!”

I assure you, when you find this feeling, you will be on track for feeling better, and creating and living from a more powerful place.

A place that points you in the direction of what you want for you. And your family.

Blessings!

And remember, I’ve got your back if you get stuck trying to feel “So What”!!!

xo,

Andrea

PS As I said, shifting into “So what” can be tricky, I won’t kid you.  But, it’s possible.

If you find yourself wanting help in this arena I have a couple of avenues of support for you.

One– My book.  Either grab a copy for yourself here.  Or grab the first 2 chapters for free here.

Two- Email me to schedule a Finding Relief Strategy Session.  It’ a 50 min. session where we’ll address your main concerns for your child and yourself.  You’ll walk away with next steps and a plan to begin shifting out of “woes me” mode and into feeling empowered and taking specific aligned actions (that I map out for you) that open up space for better experiences for you and your kids.

For those who resonate, I look forward to connecting!

And, as always, Rock ON!!!

=)

Andrea

Andrea@Ihealedmysons.com

Family photo at the Falls- Can you guess who might not want to be there?